“I can’t believe I’m doing this. I can’t believe I’m in a graveyard with a strange man hunting for vampires on a *school night*.”
Buffy-Buffy The Vampire Slayer
I’ll admit my bias upfront. I’m a John Landis fanboy. Even films I know aren’t good; I tend to give him a pass. Something about his style and comedy feels like it was made for me. While compiling my list of horror films, I was shocked that not only had I not seen Innocent Blood, but I didn’t know Landis directed it.
Innocent Blood is a modern vampire tale starring Anne Parillaud as Marie. Marie is a vampire with a thirst for bad guys. When she fails to properly dispose of one of her victims, a violent mob boss played by Robert Loggia, she bites off more than she can chew and faces a new, immortal danger. Detective Joe Gennaro, played by Anthony LaPaglia, is the unlucky cop tasked with helping her.
Innocent Blood is a true mashup of a crime/mafia drama and horror film. There are sprinkles of comedy throughout, but the first act stays true to the synopsis. Loggia is a ruthless, menacing mobster, chewing up every scene he’s in. Parillaud is fine as a femme fatale, but her thick accent and stilted performance make her wiles less than convincing. The rest of the cast is more than serviceable, with one exception. Don Rickles as Emmanuel ‘Manny’ Bergman is fantastic. I wish he were on screen more because every scene he’s in is a riot.
Landis has a knack for comedy and horror, so it’s no surprise that both these elements work for the film. The horror less so than the comedy, but the camera work and action beats are excellent. Watching Innocent Blood, I can’t help but wonder why Landis didn’t get another big opportunity. This film was a box office bomb, but it’s hard to believe he hadn’t garnered enough favor in the 80s to get multiple shots.
My biggest complaint about this film is the casting of Parillaud and LaPaglia. This is solely Landis’s fault because he fought to cast both. There is zero chemistry between the leads. Parillaud’s accent makes it hard to understand her dialogue, and she doesn’t seem to understand the film she’s in. LaPaglia, on the other hand, is just not a good actor. The role needs someone with a lot of charisma. Someone like Kurt Russell would have absolutely killed this role.
Innocent Blood is side-splitting funny. I can’t remember the last time I laughed this hard at a movie. Don Rickles gives one of his career’s most comic performances, and Robert Loggia knows precisely the movie he’s in. John Landis’s direction is a perfect fit for the action/horror/comedy genre. The film’s climax is terrific and has a set piece that is original and well-shot. I can’t believe no one talks about it. Despite having two dud lead performers, somehow, this movie is fabulous.
Rating: 7.5/10
