“Ah, it’s great to be young and insane!”
Billy- The Dream Team (1989)
A group of psychopaths escape a mental hospital after a power outage and begin a night of terror. This sounds like a pretty run-of-the-mill horror setup, right? Throw in an Oscar-winning cast, and it seems you have a classic in the making on paper. Well, some things should just stay on paper.
Alone in the Dark is a film that seems like it should be a home run, and for spurts, it is. Dwight Schultz stars as Dr. Dan Potter, the newest addition to the Haven. The Haven is an experimental psychiatric hospital run by Donald Pleasence. Pleasence plays Dr. Bain, a hippie quack who refers to patients as voyagers. Dr. Potter immediately starts to question some of the more outlandish treatments implemented by Dr. Bain. A small group of “voyagers” begin to dislike Potter and convince themselves that he murdered their previous doctor. When a massive blackout hits the area, they use it as an opportunity to escape and go after Dr. Potter.
Jack Palance, the Hollywood definition of quiet charisma, leads the group. Palance is followed by Martin Landeau, who plays an arsonist preacher named Byron Sutcliff, and Erland Van Lidth, an obese pedophile Ronald ‘Fatty’ Elste. The three men take advantage of the power outage, looting stores and killing bystanders on their way to Dr. Potter’s house.
Landeau and Palance are terrific. Landeau’s performance is wildly unhinged. He’s constantly quoting the Bible and smiling manically. Palance is much more even-keeled in his insanity. He has a moralistic worldview and believes he’s setting right someone who has been wronged. Outside of these performances, the rest of the cast is horrible. Dwight Schultz has an uneven and stiff performance. He spends most of the film scratching his head and reacting as though the events unfolding around his family are mundane.
The biggest issue with the film is an absolute abomination of a script. Rather than have this incident happen all in one night, it’s dragged out over multiple days. At one point, Fatty enters the house and plays with Potter’s daughter. This would be a clear sign that his family is in danger. Not a single cop is posted to protect the family. There is no manhunt for the escaped men, and the local authorities are used as random canon fodder. There are also multiple contrivances throughout the plot. Director Jack Sholder didn’t do the film any favors either. The action is shot as if he had only one take. It’s sloppy and void of tension.
There is a world where Alone in the Dark is a masterpiece. Multiple great actors give A+ performances, but incompetent direction coupled with an incoherent script cripples the film. If the home invasion were scary or intense, I could look past the mountain of plot contrivances, but it’s not eventful. I wish I were being hyperbolic, but the home invasion is literally men walking through doors. All the fantastic talent on screen can’t save this from being one of the blandest horror films ever made.
Rating: 4.5/10
